We co-sleep with our son and love it. Okay we love it 98% of the time. There are times that he tosses and turns and tumbles and kicks through out the entire night that make me wish he slept in his own bed. Maybe he would sleep longer in his own bed or maybe I would be up every night out of my bed over in the other room comforting him. I have no idea.
Thinking back before we had Dylan, we paid a lot of money for the fancy wood finish crib that converts to a day bed that converts to a toddler bed. We were going through the first time parent glow of happiness that one goes through before a new baby arrives. Some parents we talked to told us ‘be sure you order the crib months before your delivery date’. Some people told us to get a bassinet for the baby to sleep in our room first and then transition him to his own bed(crib). What we were never told was that there is a chance that no matter how many beds we got him, he wouldn’t sleep in any of them!
The first three months of our son’s existence were extremely difficult. He wouldn’t sleep in his own bed without a lot of crying and being against crying it out, this was not going to work for us. My brother had gotten us one of those co-sleepers that we put between us in our bed so the baby can sleep safely between us. That worked off and on occasionally. We noticed he loved sleeping in the swing. So daddy suggested we move the swing into our bedroom. And there our son slept for the first hour or so until he cried and was back in our arms again. Then we tried his bouncer. He slept pretty well actually in the bouncer but daddy and I had to sleep on our sides to keep from falling out of our bed. That wasn’t going to work. Trying to find a place for our son to sleep was really taking a toll on us. I was severely sleep deprived from getting up with our son every other hour for feedings. And then it took so much time to get him back to sleep again. How did anyone ever get through this I wondered?
The only thing that worked was holding him in the crook of my arm and letting him sleep touching me his mom, all night long. We were unsure if we wanted to go down that road. All our friends told us we were crazy that we would never “get the kid out” of our bed. Our family never told us but we know they were thinking the same thing. In fact, when people asked us if he was sleeping through the night and/or in his own bed, I cringed because I knew people would frown on the thought of us co-sleeping with our son.
Why is co-sleeping so out of the norm? If we co-sleep, the amazing thing happens, we the parents are able to finally get some sleep. We also found out the risk of SIDS decreases. The attachment between baby and parent(s) is stronger.
Now here it is 2 and a half weeks before our son’s second birthday and we still co-sleep. We often talk about moving him but both daddy and I know that as much as we want him to move, we want him to stay as well. There is nothing like watching your child lay so peacefully asleep next to you. We both love it when he reaches out for us in his sleep (or kicks you in the back when you are trying to sleep!) And yes I absolutely miss sleeping and cuddling with my husband every night. It is something we have had to sacrifice to have our son in our bed. We both know this and accept it. We have also accepted that we co-sleep. We aren’t ashamed or embarrassed to say it. I tell people all the time and I don’t care what people think. We love it, I just wish someone would have told us to save our money and buy a toddler bed instead of a fancy 3-way convertible crib!